Saturday, December 6, 2008

Gay Marriages Will Save The Economy!!

(At least, according to Marc Shaiman. Transcript follows below.)

I think this is quite possibly one of the most brilliant and relevant pieces of satire I've ever seen in my life. Besides, it's not everyday you get Jack Black as Jesus Christ.

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

It’s a brand-new bright Obama day!
What a time to be black, a girl or gay!
No, nothing could go wrong, so join us in this song
Of happy days for the gays, nothing can go wrong!

Look nobody’s watching, it’s time to spread some hate
And put it the constitution
Now, how?
Proposition 8!

(Proposition 8!)

People listen to our plea
They’ll teach kids about sodomy!

That wasn’t right, that’s a lie
But it worked so we don’t care!

Now you wish we’d all shut up
But make our clothes and fix our hair

And our love is not a sin!
Well, the Bible says it’s so!

Well, the Bible says a lot of things, you know?

Hey, how’s it goin’?

Jesus, doesn’t the Bible say these people are an abomination?

Yeah, but it says the exact same thing about this shrimp cocktail!
(mmmm, shrimp cocktail!)
Uh-uh-uh! Leviticus says shellfish is an abomination!

What else does the Bible say, Jesus?

(laughing)…The Bible says a LOT of interesting things…
Like you can stone your wife or sell your daughter into slavery
Well we ignore those verses!
Well then friend it seems to me you pick and choose
(We pick and choose!)
Well please choose love instead of hate!
Besides your nation
Was built on separation of church and state!

(See you later, sinners!)
(Bye, Jesus! Bye! We love you! I love you, Jesus!)

You know, here’s another thought to wrap things up…

Oh, every time a gay or lesbian finds love at the parade,
There’s money to be made! (He’s right!)

It’s time two grooms say “paint that wedding hall, and lavender’s the shade!”
There’s money to be made! (He has a point!)

Think of all the carriages and four white horses
There’s millions lost from all your disapproving (well that’s not good!)
Think of all the lawyers for the gay divorces,
Think of the tattoo removing!

We get it now! We’ve been such fools!

I can see America’s calling me!
Yes, gay marriages will save the economy!

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